


Vow of Silence

by Joji_Sada



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, Other, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-11-10
Updated: 2007-11-10
Packaged: 2018-10-01 13:34:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10190966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joji_Sada/pseuds/Joji_Sada
Summary: DARK FIC!!!!  Hermione tells the truth....This is a response toMistress Vamp’s Song Lyric Challenge #18posted on her website.  Enjoy.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter and any associated characters. If I did, they would be a LOT more perverted in cannon.

**A/N:** I did not take this on as a challenge, it just came to meet and fit. So, that said, this is my SIXTH response to MV’s challenges. Damn. This is a response to **Mistress Vamp’s Song Lyric Challenge #18** posted on her website. Enjoy and please give feedback.

**Song is in _italics_ and is called **Waiting for the Darkness** by **Ozzy Osbourne** It is incorporated into the story so if a line in normal script doesn’t make sense, read the song lyric prior to it and it will.

**** **** **** ****

I took a vow of silence.

My beloved books have taken residence upon the floor, the dust collecting on their bindings. My once brilliant mind is blank with nothing more darkness. 

The world has become grey. I no longer see the difference in colors. I do not differentiate based on something so trivial anymore.

I am color blind.

And I only wished it had happened much sooner than this.

_Waiting for darkness_  
Why doesn't anybody see, now  
Deafened by silence  
Why doesn't anybody hear 

No one seems to notice me anymore. My brilliance is forgotten and my heart has faded with time. They walk past me each day but I never attract attention.

I don’t call out to them like I once had. I don’t berate them for their actions or offer advice and a shoulder to cry on. I do nothing but watch.

Why?

Because it is not mine to give.

They do not ask of it and I do not offer it.

Why?

Because I have no voice.

_I’m waiting for darkness_

The silence makes time pass by slowly; or, what sense of time I have left.

The loneliness has left me wavering between insanity and contentment.

_Playing with fire_  
But they're screaming when they're burned, yeah  
Out of the sunlight  
Hasn't anybody learned 

I never paid attention to much beyond the pages of my books. I believed, quite naively, that the world was built on knowledge only gleaned from the pages of the library.

I never realized how much I had missed.

I never watched to see the sun rise nor the rain fall. I used to scoff when my best friend did. I never understood, until know, what was so exhilarating about the wind, the sky, and life.

 

I no longer question him about such things. And again, I never will. Because I am silent.

That will never change.

_I know what they'll find  
It's in their mind_

They try to block me out, but they can’t. They know they are not guilt free in anything and for once, I feel no pity for my friends. Let them lose themselves in their own mind and I lose myself in their silence—my silence—our silence.

_It's what they want to see  
Spare me from the light_

I lurk in the shadows; watching. There is nothing I do not see. I’ve learned well. Years of war have conditioned me to see everything.

And even in scales of grey, I know my surroundings better than I know my own reflection.

Better than I know myself.

Here in the darkness.

_Here comes the night  
And here I'll stay_

I will never give them anything. My voice will never sound again. Never to ask a question because there are none left. I know all I will ever need to know. 

And I learned none of it from my books.

_I'm waiting for darkness_

No, I am waiting for peace.

_Promise me rebirth_

But I may not take it.

_And then you tear me from the womb_

I will never be forced into anything again.

_Give me my freedom_

I am demanding but I know it will never truly be within my reach again.

_And then you lock me in a tomb_

You have.

In a tomb of silence.

_I know what they'll find  
It’s in their mind_

I haunt their dreams. My mind and my name may be forgotten by the world, pushed beneath the proverbial rug, but they will never be rid of me.

I will never make it so easy.

_It's what they want to see  
Spare me from the light_

They look in the mirror and there I am. I am hidden in their eyes, their hands, their life.

Haunting.

Taunting.

Silently.

_Here comes the night  
And here I'll stay_

Try again and I will help them. Try again and they will fail. I will not lose control again.

_Waiting for darkness_

You are scoffing me. You are sitting there, reading this, rightly confused at my state and you are mocking me.

You cannot believe I feel such anger—such hate.

Surely no Gryffindor can ever feel it so passionately.

You’re wrong.

Because I am out for revenge.

And, I am no Gryffindor.

_You gotta believe it's true_

I really do not care if you believe me. If you don’t, you will soon enough.

_I'm waiting for darkness  
I just can't conceive_

The world has taught me a great many things. Many things, excluding this.

_Why darkness is overdue_

It is overdue because I have not beckoned it. I am waiting for it, but I am not ready to leave yet.

_Who knows the answers_

The Boy-Who-Lived-Again and his Weasel Whore. Both men hold one secret from the world.

_Is it friend or is it foe_

I cannot call them friends.

I cannot call them men.

I cannot call them anything.

_Don't ask me questions_

I will not answer your questions.

I took a vow of silence.

_There are things you should not know_

I took a vow of silence….

The night they murdered me.

**** **** **** ****

**A/N:** This came out of nowhere while I was cleaning house. So, I sat down and wrote it….I think I even scared myself. Funny how the oddest things hit you at the oddest times. Anyway, please leave a little note.

O0o, and a huge thanks to MV for all her great ideas. Thanks Hun.


End file.
